Mom Pants

My husband, bless his heart, finds it quite humorous to pull the childrens' pants up extremely high and shout:

"Let's wear our pants as high as Mommy!"

Allow me to give you a visual, courtesy of Little Dude and his now sore bum.



That David.  What a punk.  And to think I even missed him whilst he was gone.  No!  I do not wear my pants that high!  I don't think.

Attention People Who Know Me in Real Life Who Feel My Pants are Worn This High:  Please pull me aside next time you see me and inform me of this atrocity.

Much appreciated.

So, yes. The mighty hunter has returned.  He, along with his hunting beard, came home last night.  And, yes.  He shot (not caught!  I finally learned to not say that!) a cow.

Not a moo cow.  An elk cow.  Keep up!  Since the elk was not a bull, there is no picture because there was no rack.  And hunters are only interested in the racks, didn't you know?  And, yes, I will probably be getting some immature comments about racks.  It is to be expected.  The elk came home in meat bags and is now hanging in the garage to dry.

This means I cannot go in my garage for a few days.

Mother called me last night, as she is wont to do, and asked me if David "caught" anything.  She is clearly not a hunter's wife.  I told her David "caught" an elk.

Mom:  Oh!  Is this his first elk?

Me:  No.  Hello?  Mom?  I've had to cook elk all year?  Remember?

Mom:  Oh.  My bad.

Goodness.  Someone needs to be a little more invested in her daughter's life, I see.

I would like to report that I have yet to taste elk.  Yes.  I know you are impressed. Oh, I've cooked it for about a year now.  I just don't try it.  My family LOVES it.  What is wrong with them?

I could ask around for some recipes and whatnot, but herein lies the problem:

THE RECIPE WOULD CONTAIN BITS OF ELK

And that is something that I just cannot come to terms with.  I might need to become a vegetarian.  Meat is just so animal-ish.

Bleh.

But life is not all about me (shocker!), so I am happy for my husband.  Killing animals tends to excite him.  And it is good to have him home and all clean-shaven.

Random-Topic-Quick-Change!

Are you sitting down?  I have some news for you.

My mother has joined The Facebook.

I KNOW!  She did it just to join Pinterest and then she was going to delete it and within about 2 hours she had over 50 friends!

It hurts when you discover your mom is cooler than you.

I wrote on her wall, because I can now:

Me:  You need a profile picture.  FYI.

Mom: Yes, but I think I need multiple pictures to be able to get all grandchildren/kids in and maybe even pops! Meagan says I need to take my birthdate off my profile. Do I really need to answer whether I like males or females? Goodness I am feeling old!

Oh, wow.  This is going to provide so much entertainment for me.