Question:
Who's going to the beach with me today?
Hardy-har-har.
I pull that one on my kids daily. Poor Handsome Dude always thinks we are really going. His cognitive reasoning skills are lacking, bless his heart.
Folks. We must talk. About the elephant. You know. The elephant. In the room.
My voice.
After I painstainkingly posted a darling video of my darling son, some of you said my voice was weird.
Which got me thinking . . . . do I have a weird voice?
Am I one of those people that other people shy away from because their voices are just so . . . . annoying? Is this why people in blogland think I am more interesting than people in real land . . . because people in real land can't stand to listen to me?
Is this why my friends convinced me to join the world of texting?
Is this why my husband moved me out to Ruralville?
To spare the human population of voices such as mine?
Do I sound like this woman?
(Name that TV show)
Here is a sampling of what you all said:
"Your voice does not sound the way it did in my head though. Weird.
That was Mindee.
"Aah! That is exactly what I was going to say. I don’t know what exactly I thought it would sound like, but it was different."
Different bad or different good?
"I agree with Mindee, you don’t sound like I thought you would. (Not that you sound bad or anything….)"
Mm-hmm. Sure. Right.
"And for the record, I think it makes your voice sound higher pitched than it does it real life. I’m just saying. Little ole’ me’s opinion. Over and out, good buddy. Ten-four."
This reader feels the need to defend my horrendous voice.
"But truly, my favorite part was hearing your voice. It is lovely."
I am completely suspicious of the motives behind this comment. Is this a sympathy comment? Like someone telling me my hair looks "nice" when I know I look like a drowned rat?
"He’s a cutie. You have a lovely voice!"
More sympathy! Oh, the humanity!
"I love Little Dude. And I agree with everyone that Taylor sounds differently, but she was holding a camera and trying to coerce a little guy into an impromtu performance."
Another comment in defense of my shrill, awful voice. Great.
So. I was starting to truly believe that my voice could be compared to fingernails scratching slowly down a chalkboard when Erin left a comment.
Erin! Erin will tell me the truth!
Because there is one thing I know about Erin: Erin can be harsh. And hilarious.
But, Erin didn't mention the voice! That means it is okay, right?
OR . . . my voice is so bad, she feels wrong about teasing me about it. Or she didn't actually take the time to watch the video of my cute son.
Tsk, tsk, Erin.
So, I decided to ask my dearheart friend, Bimlissa. And she suggested I get a voice transplant.
Video blogging. It is not for the faint of heart.
Nor the paranoid.
***
My husband picked up the pig today. God rest its 400lb soul. And a ham is in the oven from this fugitive pig.
I have never cooked a ham.
Let us pray that none of us shall die from food poisoning.
***
Tomorrow is an exciting day my friends.
100 (meaningless) points to whomever can guess what we are doing.
Happy Weekend!
The only thought about your voice I had was that you sound young, just like I do, and then I wondered if people ever call your house and when you answer ask for you mom because you sound 12 years old, just like I do.
ReplyDeleteBut I kept all that in my head.
Until now.
Darn, I am second :( Boo hoo to mee...
ReplyDeleteFRIENDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteYay, I am first to leave a comment!!!!!!!!! Yeah, I have no life, first to comment on a Saturday night...
I think your voice is cute, and NO, not trying to make you feel better, because I DO think it's a cute voice!!!
Ack! I feel terrible. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with your voice at all. It's just that in my head, when I read your posts, my brain has assigned a "voice" to you. Probably because your posts are so well written and engaging and conversational!
ReplyDeleteBut then when I heard your real voice it did not match the voice my brain has assigned to you so the difference was weird. NOT your voice.
The same thing happened the first time I heard PW and Katie from Marriage Confessions I swear. It seems that my brain isn't all that good at predicting what a voice will sound like.
See how I just compared you to THE uber blogger there?
Forgive me?
Ha! Of course! I was just joshin'. :) I am not mad at all.
ReplyDeleteI just had nothing else to blog about.
Hahaha.....but you're still coming to see me, right?? Good luck with family photos =)
ReplyDeleteThat's Janice from Friends of course!! And NOOOOO you don't sound like her!
ReplyDeleteOh, if I had to guess what you're doing tomorrow, I'd have to say cutting a Christmas tree...?
The picture is from Friends and I guess you are taking family pictures.
ReplyDeleteI seriously was lulled to sleep by your voice whilst listening to said recording. I woke up in a wonderful mood, cleaned the house, oven, shower, and crawl space. Then I proceeded to exercise vigorously for 3 and 1/2 hours. After which I donned a ball gown and pearls for my husbands arrival home from work.. There was just something about that voice... it was, dare I say, ..... *angelic*.....
ReplyDeleteI shall require pictures of the ham...(or request, whatever).
ReplyDeleteFor what it is worth, I can't stand my voice when I hear it on the answering machine. Hence, the little automated answering machine man as my message!
Biggest stress in my life, trying to get a picture with everyone looking at the camera at the same time. AND I only have three. One more child would put me over the edge. In more ways than just pictures! When my youngest was smaller, we resorted to giving her a candy cane as a bribe. I have a picture to prove my superior parenting skills! But at least all three of them were looking at the camera. I don't even have the smiling standard anymore. Clearly, my standards are high! Have fun with it.
ReplyDeletejust watched the video for the first time. your voice is not near as cute as little dude's but it is indeed "lovely" as the commenter said. not a sympathy comment at all. it is soothing. so pleasant that it almost makes me want to move to ruralville so i can hear it all the time. but then i see the pictures of the snow and remember the stories of rhodents taking up residence in the car and i think i am happy to just hear it now and again through the computer.
ReplyDeleteTaylor Maliblahblah! I really like your voice. It is sweet and southern. It sounded like someone who would be a friend of mine (I have several southern friends. :) ). I, too, apologize for making a big scene.
ReplyDeleteJanice, you are not!! I have to giggle when I think about her laugh, though.
Your voice sounded perfectly normal in the video. After several commenters mentioned it, I--being the paranoid type personality that I am--thought "that would make me really paranoid if people kept commenting like that". Since you sounded perfectly normal, I thought about mentioning that you sounded perfectly normal, but then I--being the paranoid type personality that I am--thought, "if someone mentioned that I sounded normal after all those other comments, I would think they were lying and trying to be nice to counter all those other comments". So I didn't comment at all. But I did commiserate with you because I am also completely paranoid. Notice that I have never posted a video. And it's entirely because I'm afraid people will criticize my voice, and it has nothing to do with the fact that I have no idea how to make a video, much less post one.
ReplyDeleteJudging from your picture, you're going to have a yard sale that features your children. I hope you get a good price for them.
Exactly how long does one cook a 400 lb. ham?
Hmmm.... I thought your voice sounded perfectly normal. That's exactly what I thought when I heard it. Ha! Weird, I know. Not because I ever thought it would sound strange, but because I think my voice sounds strange, and therefore I will not be putting it on video on my blog. I am always very jealous of people with normal voices. Weird fact: I have some sort of accent, even though I think I don't have any accent at all. But, almost every time I leave the house I get asked if I am from the south. I do not drawl-I don't think. I've had people argue with me that I MUST be from Texas, several times. I've never been to any part of the south, or Texas. Very weird. My husband says I have an Eastern WA accent. Very strange. I'm constantly puzzled by this, to the point where when people from the south talk, I listen very closely in hopes that I can figure out how it is that I have a southern accent of some sort, apparently. This comment ended up being a very long rant, I apologize for that. Have fun with your Christmas card making!!! You should have all the kids make a crazy face, and then get a 4 picture christmas card, and put one of their crazy faces in each one, and then call it good. That way the weirdness is intentional, instead of stressing about getting a good picture. Ha! That's how I cop out of stressing about loveliness.
ReplyDeleteParanoid? Yes.
ReplyDeleteThat's what happens in Ruralville. There is a reason why crazy-type people live "away-out-thar."
Not that you're crazy.
Yet.
I didn't think your voice was weird. And I totally don't think you are on Janet level! God speed on your Christmas card photo adventure, Taylor. God speed.
ReplyDeleteMy reaction was you have one of those really rich sounding voices that usually means someone can sing. Do you sing? And the other thing was, no wonder you have a happy home. A mother who talks like you do to her kids the way do makes for a happy home.
ReplyDeleteYour voice doesn't sound weird at all...and I'm a trained professional! :D
ReplyDeleteHope the pictures came out okay!
Lovely Taylor, lovely voice :)
ReplyDeletesorry!! =)
ReplyDeleteThere's nothing wrong with your voice! I would imagine it's kind of like when you hear radio show hosts and get an image in your head of what they look like, only to see their picture later and realize how off you were. Only in reverse...but you know what I mean ;)
ReplyDeleteI just started following you so I didn't have any preconceived notion about what your voice would sound like before seeing the video. I think you sound fine. As far as your "pitch" being high, don't all mothers talk to their little kids in a voice higher than when they talk to "older" kids or adults? I know I do.
ReplyDeleteYes, Taylor. I watched the video.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, I was hoping for a reason to be harsh.
But your voice was too normal.
So rest peacefully my paranoid interfriend.
Your voice sounds wonderful! Forget the paranoia!
ReplyDeleteI've been away but of course I hurried over here to see what I missed : )
ReplyDeleteI just listened to the video...I don't think there is anything 'weird' about your voice. I think when we read a blog we imagine people talk a certain way or maybe at a certain pitch and if its not how we imagined we have to fit that into our picture of the person.
I liked hearing your voice because now I put it with your written words. And Little Dude is super cute!
You are taking pictures for your Christmas card and my comment was NOT a pity comment! ;)
ReplyDeleteUmm, it's not your voice because it is fine, so....it must be their ears! Not that there is anything wrong with their ears, but...that must be the answer. Yes, that is it! Not your voice, just their ears. Maybe...
ReplyDeleteI thought you had a lovely, perfectly normal voice. Maybe a bit more normal (mid-western) accent than I expected. :)
ReplyDeleteHA ha ha! That's funny.....
ReplyDeletecoming from you, especially...... xoxo
Dear Miss Paranoia,
ReplyDeleteWe love you, weird voice or not. Ha ha ha ha ha!
Love, MindyLou
I'm really not sure why we're talking about Taylor's voice when clearly Little Dude is the most precious thing on the planet singing out about mommy and daddy k-i-s-s-i-n-g! super cute!!!!
ReplyDelete