Yesterday.
Yesterday was an exciting day.
Why, yes!
I'm glad you asked!
That most certainly is hundreds of pounds of frozen beef scattered upon my kitchen floor.
Believe it or not, this project took us all night.
And when I say us, I mean mostly The Lumberjack, with yours truly lending a "helping hand" when needed.
And I use the term "helping hand" very loosely.
Psssst!
Hey Lumberjack!
What's going on there in the glowing room of doom?
Hello?
Guess who doesn't get to do laundry for approximately 2-3 weeks?
Guess who must do at least 2 loads of laundry a day?
Guess who will be hauling laundry to her mama's house?
Can we stop for a minute and discuss this gun safe?
This gun safe was heavy.
The Lumberjack stopped and borrowed a "hand truck" from his brother-in-law.
A hand truck.
These are things I knew not existed until I met my dashing Lumberjack.
And now, I would like to introduce you to a new segment called,
"Who are these people, my in-laws?"
Who are these people, where they know what a hand truck is?
And not only that, one of them has one.
"Hey! Can I borrow your hand truck?"
"Sure. You gonna pick it up in your rig?"
"Yeah. I got to take a load to the dump, so I will swing by."
"Ok. Hey! Are you helping put a new engine in Alex's rig?"
"Probably, but first I got to go and get a few cords of wood. Speaking of which, can I borrow your cables and your saw?"
"Sure. Hey, this summer we should go spear fishing!"
"Sounds good. Later."
And that concludes the segment:
Who are these people, my in-laws?
Thank you.
So, my job is to push with all my might to help hoist this safe onto the hand truck so my Lumberjack can move it to its destination.
So I start pushing with all my might.
And nothing happens.
LJ: Ok . . . push now.
Me: I am!
LJ: Harder!
Me: I can't!
LJ: HARDER!
Me: I got a cramp!
LJ: *sigh* Fine. Switch me spots.
Now, folks.
This is my beef with the Lumberjack.
He never tells me "the plan."
A) I don't know what a hand truck is in the first place.
B) I don't know the purpose of a hand truck.
C) I don't know what The Lumberjack's job was on the other side of the safe, so how will I know how to fill his shoes?
D) I don't understand why we bought a fixer-upper house.
E) I would rather be taking a bubble bath.
Me: Ok! Ready!
(PS-I really wasn't ready because I didn't know what to be ready for. I was just trying to please my man and act like I was helpful.)
LJ: (grunting, straining) Taylor! Put your foot in front of the wheel!
Me: The safe has wheels?
LJ: Of the hand truck!!
Me: Oh, right.
He starts pushing.
Me: Stop! You are running over my foot.
LJ: Taylor. Stop the wheel with your foot.
Me: I am NOT wearing work boots like you, you know.
LJ: Fine.
Let us have a moment of applause for my Lumberjack who did not lose his patience with me once.
Not once.
He went and grabbed a hammer and stuck it under the wheels of the hand truck.
LJ: Now . . . please. Don't let it move.
Me: Okie dokie!
So, my Lumberjack, in all his muscularness, loads this safe onto the hand truck.
Then we (and when I say we, I mean he) almost killed ourselves moving the safe to the living room.
Me: Ha! I bet you wish you had someone a little more helpful here tonight!
LJ: Nope. I'm fine.
Me: Oh, I am not a bit helpful.
LJ: Yes you are.
Me: No. I think I am actually negative helpful.
LJ: No. You were helpful.
Me: On a scale of 1-10, I was like a -3. And the only reason why I was not a -7 was because I am so darn cute.
Nothing.
No response.
Me: Right?
LJ: What?
Me: I am cute, right?
LJ: Sure.
Hmmm . . . .
So . . .
Our freezer is on our porch.
(Classy!)
Our washer and dryer are by the kitchen table.
The safe is in the living room.
The laundry is being outsourced.
Can anyone guess what's going on at our house?
Happy Wednesday!
100 (meaningless) points to anyone who can guess how many guns The Lumberjack has in his safe.
Your laundry room is finally being finished? If so, WhoHoo. He has five guns. That is a big safe to fill.
ReplyDelete3? are you getting a new floor in your laundry room??!! did you know this was happening or was it a surprise?
ReplyDeleteThis is a scene that could be COMPLETELY out of my life!!!! When Mr. Incredible redid our kitchen (okay, so he kind of HAD to, I had maybe a tiny kitchen fire, well, maybe more than tiny...BUT I did get rid of the U-G-L-Y 80's salmon colored countertops!) the fridge was in the living room, stove in the garage and i walked on backer board for three months. I am with you on the plan, I find just smiling and nodding my head usually works. SO glad you stopped by, I visited here, I have a feeling we are married to very similar men!
ReplyDeleteYay for a new laundry room!!!
ReplyDeleteJack came home and said there was free beef at your house for the next couple of weeks (because of the freezer on the porch) so watch out we may be stealin some.
Hey wait a minute Tay!! we have a hand truck....well two actually.. one of them I refer to as Fisher :)
ReplyDeleteI could totally use a handtruck. You might consider using it to haul the laundry around. Just sayin...
ReplyDelete8 guns?
Hmmmm. I'm gonna go with seven, because that's about what Brian has. I mean, every man needs a shotgun (or two), a rifle (or two), a .22, some random gun that is or will soon be an antique, and so on and so forth.
ReplyDeleteAnd, I'm going to guess that after much teasing and whining about the laundry room to all your listeneners, LJ decided to finish it up and be a hero to all. Or something of that nature.
Also, I will by later to pick up some steaks and more hamburger. FYI. Or just let me know if you need some freezer space, cause I got that as well. :)
We do not have a handtruck but I was equally helpful when we hung the tapestry a few weeks ago. I kept saying, "I'm not a mind reader" because for some reason the hubs expected me to know what to hand him/ how to help him without actually telling me. I do not have instincts for that type of thing. Pretty sure that's why God gave us husbands in the first place.
ReplyDeleteI guess 4. Is there a prize? Is it meat?
i'm gonna say six guns...and my guess is that he is FINALLY gonna finish your laundry room....WTG LJ!!!! :) **applauding LJ**
ReplyDeleteWoohoo! Looks like a finished laundry room is in sight for you, although we all know how home projects take twice as long as they were originally going to! Hoping for a shorter deadline instead of a longer one for you!
ReplyDeleteThe fact that handtrucks actually work has always mystified me. They look completely useless but then you load on a ton of crates or boxes and you can move 5x the amount of junk in one trip. They are super helpful when you are moving to a new apartment for the third time in three years, especially if your house is filled to the gills with millions of books... not that I know what that's like...
So I googled "hand truck"
ReplyDeleteIs it or is it not the same thing as a dolly?
This is just priceless! I am so glad your LJ was great about the move of the safe with all your help!
ReplyDeleteI am going to have to say zero guns just because it is such a big heavy gun safe and well even though I don't know you (since this is a first time read) I am going with zero.
This whole helping-with-the-safe-thing? That's why I had so many boys. So that eventually they would be able to help their dad, AND tell me what he means when he says things like "hand truck".
ReplyDeleteAs for the gun question, I'm guessing he has as many as my husband does. Indiana's safe looks to be about the same size. Those same boys helped their dad load his safe onto a hand truck, and tug and push and pull it up the stairs. We are never moving.
BTW, I think you should give extra points for people who not only guess the amount of guns, but also guess the ratio of handguns to shotguns and rifles. AND how much ammo does he have?
I would guess "0" cuz that would be sooooo funny.
ReplyDeleteYou are asking the wrong girl.
ReplyDeleteMy guess is 12 guns. I think that's how many there are in my son's safe. And he sounds very much like your lumberjack.
ReplyDeleteHappy remodeling.
Anyone who moves should know what a hand truck and a dolly are. If he can borrow the hand truck, why can't he also borrow the owner of the hand truck so you can take a bubble bath? Guns? too many. goober. you now have a gun safe in your living room. But you never explained why packages of meat are on the kitchen floor? Meat can't be thawed and refroze, can it?
ReplyDeleteLOL, sounds like me and my husband.."we" do house projects all the time "together" ;) Are you having your floors redone? I think this is my first time stopping by, you have a great blog :)
ReplyDeleteWe had to empty the freezer, move it to the porch, then load all the meat back in. :) The meat was out for about 5 minutes.
ReplyDeleteHahaha! I love this show! Seriously, you are better than television!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Allie :)
ReplyDeleteMy guys is 7 guns. But only because that is my favorite number.
I am SUPER impressed with LJ not losing his patience. This sounds just like my house when we do a "project" together, except my hubby tends to get a little frustruated that I don't automatically know the "plan"
Oops! I mean guess :)
ReplyDelete6 guns?
ReplyDeleteThis was really funny. I have a ladder in the middle of my living room, a hole in my wall, and three light fixtures in pieces on my kitchen table. I feel for you. ;-)
-FringeGirl
It's me again, I just read this to Mr. Incredible and he laughed and said to give Lumberjack a manly fist bump for him, he feels his pain! I said, you mean his incredible joy for being married to such a beautiful wife? He said, Yeah, same thing...HA!
ReplyDeleteYour beef with The Lumberjack...hardeeharhar. Get it?!
ReplyDeleteYay for a new laundry room!
And I really like Jackie's guess.
my grandmother has a hand truck/dolly...best invention EVER.
ReplyDeletei'm going to go w/one gun. haha
have a great day and good luck w/your redo! i love me some home redos!
In response to your comment on my post, April 7th is National No Housework today. Seeing as I ONLY discovered it at 7 pm, I'm re-living it today. )it was linked in my post, but I don't know if it stood out)
ReplyDeleteThanks for dropping by.
I win. I guessed - "too many"! ha ha
ReplyDeleteI thought I had a lot of meat. That my friend is a ton! Does it really all fit in your freezer?
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this stuff dear. light duty casters & polyurethane wheels manufacturers & rubber wheel
ReplyDelete