Candyman

Halloween.
Raise your hand if you are already sick of it.

P.S.-I am raising both hands.

Since Halloween fell on a Saturday this year, we get to do the "get dressed up and eats tons of candy" two days in a row!

I can't hardly contain my excitement.

Want to know something sad?

Today is Halloween.

And I have no idea what the boys will dress up as.

And I don't care.

The Lumberjack cares more about Halloween than I do.

But he just likes it for all the free candy.

Let's see who knows my Lumberjack the best-

Pop Quiz!

1)  After the kids have gathered all their candy, The Lumberjack:

a)  Helps them sort through the candy, checking for choking hazards, and limits them to two pieces a day.

b)  Sorts through the candy himself, taking out all the good candies like Snickers and Reeses for himself, and leaving the children with banana tootsie rolls and Smarties.  Then he takes the bag of good candies out to his work van so no one else can eat it.

c)  Dumps all the candy in one big community bowl for all to share.

Think about it hard, class.

Take your time.

The winner gets 27 banana tootsie rolls.

Frugal Friday:Fitness

Visit www.lifeasmom.com for more tips!

Tonight at dinner, I asked my husband tonight if we could get a family gym membership.

He said no.

Because it's too expensive.

I asked him if just I could get a gym membership.

He said no.

Because it's too expensive.

I asked him if we could go on a run as a family.

He said no.

Because that just would not work.

So, I was annoyed.

Then I took another helping of Fettucine Alfredo.

Because that will help my situation.

And then I asked him if we could break out the Wii Fit that has been sitting in the box for 3 months.

He said Yes!

Once you get past the initial, outrageously high cost of a Wii, and a Wii fit, the Wii Fit is a pretty cheap way to get some exercise as a family.

We bought our Wii used from my brother-in-law, so we got ours for a good deal.

At least that's what my brother-in-law told us.

We really know nothing about these things.

But, I digress.

We decided to use the Wii Fit as a family to get some exercise.

Oh, sure, you could be truly frugal and just go on a walk.

But sometimes, you gotta do something different.

Plus it takes too much time to find everyone's socks, shoes, and jackets.

Here is our oldest child.

She is 6 years old.

Her Wii Fit Age: 32

We told our girls to put on exercise clothes and this is what they came up with.

They get their fashion sense from me.

Our second daughter is 5 years old.

Her Wii Fit Age: 35

And now, time for the super fit adults.

Would you like to know what my husband did?

Since he had the Wii remote, he decided it would be swell to click on the button that revealed how much I weighed.

Does he not know that a woman's weight is to never be revealed?

Oh, he is in trouble.

Here I am in my lovely exercise clothes.

My actual age is 28.

Sad, I know.

I have also owned 2 different minivans and I have varicose veins.

What happened?

Look at how many calories I am burning!

This Wii Fit works wonders!

My Wii Fit Age: 33.

Here is my revenge on the Lumberjack for discovering how much I weigh:

An action shot of my husband "working out."

Oh, I am in trouble.

Carhartts.

For to work out.

Brilliant!

His actual age: 29.

His Wii Fit Age: 49.

Yes!

Ha!

I win!

 I win!

 I win!

So, our family spent most of the night trying to get our Mii's set up on the Wii.

And we are not high tech, so this took us awhile.

But, if we ever do figure it out and use it regularly, we could end up saving a lot of money over time.

And we could get in great shape!

But, I wouldn't hold my breath if I were you.

Are Wii fit?

No.

No, Wii are not.

In a Funk

 

 

I am in need of a change.

Now, don't get me wrong.

I love my children.

I love my life.

But . . . somedays.

Somedays I just don't want to do it anymore.

I long to do something . . .

 . . . anything . . .

else.

Give me a uniform, I'll go flip burgers.

Give me a broom, I'll go clean offices.

Give me a hairnet, I'll cook some food.

Just, please.

Please.

Give me change.

I am tired of cleaning a house that is always messy.

I am bored of reading books that have already been read.

I am sick of doing laundry everyday in a house where there is always more laundry to be done.

I am ready for a break.

A break from my toast making, dishes washing, sippy cup filling, diaper changing, time-out monitoring, nose-wiping, ABC tutoring, and toy organizing life.

I believe that I might be in a  funk.

Yesterday, I sat downstairs and tried to eat breakfast and read The Pioneer Woman's blog.

For 10 minutes.

And in that 10 minutes, my two boys, as precious as they are, moved two suitcases into the bathroom, turned on the tv to a fuzzy channel, turned on two ceiling fans, lovingly placed 4.5 pairs of earrings in the hallway, started running the bath water, and took the lid off of my favorite chapstick and threw it into the tub.

10 minutes.

Was that too much to ask?

Ooooh.

There are days where I cannot WAIT for them to all grow up!

Oh, yes.

I will drop them all off at school.  I will come home and eat breakfast for 15 minutes while reading The Pioneer Woman's blog. 

Then I will clean my house and it will STAY clean. 

 I will catch up on the laundry.

  I will grocery shop in peace. 

 I will have childfree coffee dates with friends. 

I will not have snot on my jacket when I go to the store. 

I will not have matchbox cars in my pockets and crackers in my purse. 

 I will super fit because I will have had time to exercise. 

 I will read. 

 I will volunteer. 

 I will have a great and grand life.

And then I will come home and sit in my clean, yet quiet house.

And I will cry.

I will cry because my babies are all grown up and I miss them.

Motherhood.

It's a quandary, I tell ya.

Ah . . .

Such is life.

"Unless the Lord builds a house, its builders labor in vain . . . In vain you rise early and stay up late . . . Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from Him."

Psalms 127

"God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.  Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea . . . Be still and know that I am God."

Psalms 46

Fun with Pumpkins

Tonight was our annual pumpkin carving night.

For dinner, we had Tater Tot Taco Salad.

The kids have fun with this dinner, so I thought I would share the recipe, as it is so very simple.

I just prep all the ingredients and set them out on the table and let everyone build their plates as they choose.

I set out:

1 lb cooked beef, seasoned with taco seasoning

refried beans, warmed

baked tater tots

shredded lettuce

shredded cheese

sour cream

salsa

and, in honor or my in-laws, ketchup

It is quick, easy, and fun!

Well, as fun as taco salad can be.

It was a hit with everyone . . .

except handsome dude.

He is a stubborn, handsome dude.

He sat in his highchair for 2 hours.

He started off in a regular chair.

Then, when we realized that he was going to make life difficult for us, we decided to make life difficult for him and strap him into the highchair and make him eat ALL of his dinner.

Hence, the two hours.

We are not pumpkin snobs.

Our pumpkins never turn out cute, crafty, or clever.

We just give the kids a sharpie and let them design to their heart's delight.

This girl is precious to my heart.

She calls me mudder.

*tear*

Once the drawings are complete,  the lumberjack, along with his large muscles, carves out the shapes.

He really likes this part.

He feels that fall would not be complete without this special tradition in our family.

The lumberjack is super festive and loves all things traditional.

Notice handsome dude is not in any fun pumpkin shots.

Notice Mabel is really hoping to help handsome dude out with his dinner.

Little dude here is the opposite of handsome dude.

Little dude ate 3 helpings of tater tot taco salad.

Then little dude snacked on the pumpkin guts and seeds.

And little dude had the diaper to prove it.

I heart little dude.

*sigh*

I heart handsome dude, too.

TaDa!

Four fantabulous pumpkins, two artistic girls, one cute little dude, one handsome dude having a quick break from his dinner for a photo op, and one lovely mudder.

Crazykins

In-laws.

Mine are crazy.

They call burritos tacos.

They put ketchup on their tacos, which are actually burritos.

They pronounce the word "measure", "may-zure."

They wash and reuse ziplock bags.

They have 3 different garbage cans: trash, burn, compost.

I never know which one to use.

Gum is the trickiest for me.

The lumberjack tells me to put it in the burn trashcan.

But then my father-in-law gets angry and gripes about scraping gum out of the burn barrels.

And then the lumberjack laughs and laughs and tells him I did it.

Which has led me to believe that the lumberjack has played a trick on me.

It is best to just swallow the gum.

They buy spices in bulk.

They raise their own chickens for farm fresh eggs.

They raise their own pigs.

They have names for their beef.

They always use tablecloths.

They make their own applesauce.

They smear said applesauce on pork chops.

They lather said applesauce on chocolate cake.

They glob said applesauce on chocolate chip cookies.

They are big fans of their applesauce.

Their Christmas lists ask for drills, wrenches, shop vacs, and pressure washers.

They fix their own cars.

They tile their own floors.

They refinish their own furniture.

They used to make me blush when discussing their stripping parties.

But now, I understand that stripping means something different to those who refinish furniture.

They are very different from my family.

My family is not weird at all.

Nope.

Not one bit.

We correctly say "measure."

We know the difference between burritos and tacos.

We put salsa on tacos and burritos.

We put ketchup on burgers.

We call repairmen when something is broken.

We just buy new furniture.

We buy eggs from the store.

We buy pork from the store.

We buy beef from the store.

We buy applesauce from the store.

We buy plenty of ziplock bags and throw them away after each use.

And to the best of my knowledge, my parents have never stripped regularly on Thursdays.

If you know otherwise, please don't tell me.

In-laws.

Yes, they are different.

But, they are pretty fun, too.

After 9 years, I am definitely getting used to their wacky ways.

I helped make applesauce.

I've caught myself calling a burrito a taco.

I put out salsa and ketchup when making tacos.

I am married to my own repairman.

I've even stripped with the Lumberjack.

A table, people.

We stripped a table.

Goodness.

But I will never, ever, ever reuse a ziplock bag.

That is just crossing the line.

Frugal Friday

Good Morning, World!

”

When you look in many toy stores, you can find tons of expensive electronic gadgets for your kids that claim to help improve reading skills.  One year on Black Friday, I bought a Leap Pad for super cheap, like $15, for my daughter.  She was sooo excited!  She enjoyed it . . . it was fun, but in order to enjoy it, you should purchase the books/cartridges that go with it.  This is where it gets expensive.  Plus, batteries.  Plus, my daughter chewed on the cord of the wand and broke the entire unit within 2 months.

Does anyone else's kids chew on everything?

My boys don't.

But my girls did.

They still do.

Weird girls.

Anywho, today I am going to offer some fun and frugal ideas to help promote reading in your kids, without spending any money.

1)  Closed Captioning on your Television.

Seriously.

Ok, so I have a hearing problem.  And David got sick and tired of me saying,

"What happened?"

"What did he say?"

"What's going on?"

So, he figured out how to get the closed captioning on the television.  And we can't figure out how to take it off.

We are not a family known for our technological skills.

Just our lumberjacking skills.

But, I am okay with the closed captioning being on, because otherwise I might miss hilarious lines like,
"That's why it's called MURDER not MUKDUK!"

Ha!  Name that TV Show/Character

Back in the dark ages when I was still in college and childfree, I learned in my children's literacy classes that having closed captioning on the tv helps kids with their reading skills.  They can associate the written word with the spoken word and blah blah blah, they start to pick up a few reading skills.

Now, don't have your kids in front of the tv all the time.

But, if you are allowing them to watch a quick show so you can empty the dishwasher without your one year old throwing plates onto the floor and your two year old chasing his sister with the knives, then flip on the closed captioning and let them learn away!

2)  Free sites for kids on the computer.  Kids can play fun games and learn computer skills while learning some reading skills.

www.starfall.com is a good one.  Also, www.pbskids.org.

3)  Books on CD or Tape.  Letting your kids listen and be exposed to tons and tons of words is excellent.  You can get books on CD or tape for free at the library.  Or, if you get "Charlotte's Web" on tape and your girls' take out all the "fun brown string", it could end up costing you $20 to pay to replace it.

4)  Read  to your kids.  Some books we have tried :

Little House on the Prairie series

Chronicles of Narnia series

Bible

Stuart Little

 

Feel free to add any more suggestions!

Happy Frugal Friday!

For more frugal ideas, visit: My Life as Mom

Best Husband Ever.

I have the best husband ever.

Let's look at the facts:

*  He makes coffee every morning.  For this reason alone, I will keep him around.

* He pumps my gas for me.  I have been terrified to get gas ever since he bought me a diesel rig.  I know nothing about diesel.  I am certain I have not put gas in any vehicle in approximately 3 years.

*  He seems to think I look good in a swimsuit.  For this reason alone, I am sure he is delusional.

*He works from dawn until dusk to provide for our family, allowing me to stay at home and raise the children.

*He makes me go shopping all by myself every once in a while.  I pretend to protest . . . for a while.  And then I go and spend all that hard earned money of his. 

* He keeps the home fires burning.

*Ahem*

I was referring to these home fires:

Let's keep it clean, folks.

*  My husband, along with his posse, makes walking through the remote mountains where scary bears and mountain lions lurk, a safe and enjoyable experience.

 

*  He has put on weight since we were first married.  I know this reason may seem odd.  But when we first married, he was only about 10 pounds heavier than I was. 

  He has since put on about 30 pounds, leaving me much more space in my "at least I weigh less than my husband" window.

*He is taking me on a vacation WITHOUT the children for our ten year anniversary! 

WooHoo!

But where should we go?

Hawaii?

Cruise?

Cancun?

Such a hard decision.

What a difficult life I have!

So-your turn! 

Why is your husband the best?

It's just not happening.

At the age of 2 1/2, both of my girls were potty trained.

 My oldest boy is now 2 1/2.

So, logically, potty-training seems to be the perfect next step in my handsome dude's development.

Never mind that he can't sit still at the table.

Never mind that he can't keep his glasses on.

Never mind that he cannot yet dress himself.

He is 2 1/2. 

And I am certain it is time.

Besides.

Until today, I have never, ever, ever purchased teeny-tiny, tight, cotton briefs in a manly camouflage pattern.

So, of course, potty-training was the right thing to do.

But it was so wrong for my handsome dude.

It turned his world upside down.

The feel of underwear against his bare bum was just not working for him.

And he just wasn't understanding the "plan."

"Dude, do you have to go potty?"

"huh?"

"Dude, are you a big boy now?"

"huh?"

"Dude, let's go potty in the toilet!"

"huh?"

But I am his mother and I know what is best.

And I have determined that the time has come.

Plus, I am tired of buying diapers for two.

Perhaps

I made

a mistake.

 

It takes a seasoned mother to be able to admit that.

So, my kid is not ready.

And I am not ready.

Life is crazier here now than it was when I just had the little girls.

The number of children living here has doubled.

And this guy:This guy has been teething for ages now.

I think he was born teething.

I think I had a little too much on my plate to attempt this great feat.

And then, I decided to make Chicken Parmigiana from The Pioneer Woman.

Because I had nothing else going on.

It was delicious.

I kid you not.

It just took a little longer than expected.

So, it was not the best time to try and attempt potty training with my crazy 2 year old.

The same 2 year old who was found taking all the clean butter knives out of the silverware drawer, buttering them, and then gently placing them back in the silverware drawer.

Yes, folks.

That's my boy.

*sigh*

We'll try again later.