Ten Things Tuesday

It is the Tuesday before Christmas.

Life is hectic.

And here are Ten Random Things that In No Way Relate to One Another:

1)  She did it.

Well, technically, I did it.

But my mom got her Christmas cards out on Monday.

And that concludes all Christmas Card Photo Drama for the year.

And mother learned something new.

She learned the difference between "copy and paste" and "cut and paste."

She was amazed.

I, too, am amazed at what a simple right-click can do.

2)  Want to hear something funny the Lumberjack said to me last night?

Oh, man.

It's good.

Okay.

"Gosh.  You sure have been cooking a lot of beef lately."

Ummm . . . .

Hello?

Sir Lumberjack, remember . . . you helped to shoot a cow?

Then you helped to butcher it.

Then you picked it up from the place that makes the beef into nice little white packages.

Then you helped load the entire cow into our freezer.

Do you remember these events, Lumberjack?

3)  So, I made fun of my dad in the post "More Christmas Card Photo Drama."

I made fun of his 2-song IPod.

He commented for the first time on my blog on that post.

His comment?

"Hey! Back off. I have well over a hundred songs on my IPOD. Dad."

Ok, Dad.

You win.

100 songs is quite a bit to have on an IPod that you have owned for 2 years.

I stand corrected.

4)  Why you don't come to this site for craft ideas:

Yes.

The girls and I made a nativity yesterday out of toilet paper tubes, construction paper, tape, cotton balls, and an old egg carton.

I am sure Mary had bright red hair with braids like Pipi Longstocking.

"Mom . . . this is gonna be so awesome . . . "

"We should keep this forever."

5)  Handsome Dude saw "Tanta Cause on da Bire Cruck" last night.

Dear Santa,

Handsome Dude needs some bigger pajamas.

Thank you.

He is only 2.

But he has skipped over sizes 2T and 3T went straight to 4T.

I keep checking his birth year.

He really is 2.

6)  Years ago, the Lumberjack's siblings took a photo of him with a fish he caught.

I don't know much about fish, but apparently it is not that impressive of a catch.

As a joke, his siblings printed it out and hung it at the local Sportsman's Warehouse.

So there's the Lumberjack with his not-so-impressive fish hanging up on the bragging wall.

So, he went there and took it down and gave it to Daisy Mae, who has kept it in her room all this time.

Yesterday, she made it into an ornament and hung it on the tree:

And she apparently decided he needed a tattoo.

7)  I am baking cookies all day with my mom.

Oh, and the four little Lumberjacklings will be tagging along.

Darn.

8)  I am still plugging in my car.

9)  I have another appointment for my varicose veins today.

Seriously?

Yes.

It didn't work.

They are still there and bother me something fierce.

10)  And while we are on the subject of horrible things we have to go through because of our children, allow me to share a horror story with you.

Brace yourselves.

Yesterday.

Little Dude has his 18 month well-check.

Little Dude can be a pretty mellow guy.

But when he is mad, he is mad.

So, they need to weigh him.

He will not do it.

He is thrashing.

And screaming.

And flailing.

And thrashing.

So the nurse looks at me and says,

"Okay, Mama, we are going to need to weigh you and then weigh you holding Little Dude."

Oh, the horror!

Okay, normally, if I weigh myself, I don't eat for hours beforehand.

I can't have any clothes on (gasp!)

I must have just used the bathroom.

And I have to clean out my ears.

Because that is the only time I would get a realistic weight.

But, because of Little Dude, I have to stand on that scale, fully clothed with winter layers, full bladder, BOOTS, and who knows how much ear wax.

And I have to get weighed at the pediatric office.

It is one of those horrible scales that you first have to guess which 50 pound bracket you are in.

Clunk.

Clunk.

Horrible.

No.

You do not get to know how much I weighed.